Happiness is one of those feelings which everybody craves for. We all seek to be happy, but it seems like a faraway dream.
Everybody wishes happiness in life and yet nobody seems to find happiness – this simply means that we have a wrong understanding of what happiness is. If an individual has understood happiness, how is it possible that he manages to become unhappy all the time?
Therefore, it is important for us to understand how we deceive ourself into thinking that we are happy which is the major cause of unhappiness. Remember unhappiness itself is not the problem, but our lack of understanding of what happiness is is the real problem.
In today’s topic, I would like to discuss some of the ways in which you can identify whether you’re really happy or if your happiness is simply a pretention.
You have no reason to be happy:
This is one of the indications that you are truly happy. It is understandable to feel happy in the midst of a circumstance that triggers you to feel happy. You have got a promotion at work, you had a satisfying meal at your favourite restaurant, your wife has cooked your favourite meal, or your friends have given you a surprise on your birthday – All of these things on the outside trigger happiness.
For a person who is really happy, nothing triggers happiness. As a matter of fact, everything outside him just adds to the happiness that already exists within.
In your life too, if you are really joyous from within, in every circumstance and situation you will find yourself feeling happy. Your friends may ask you what kind of stuff you’ve been smoking lately.
Every happy person to the outside world seems like a drug addict, because in this world which is so harsh, where there is failure, darkness, and sorrow it is hard for people to imagine that there can be anything else besides drugs, alcohol, or food that can make a person happy.
A person who is not really happy, or a person whose happiness is just superficial will always need an outside trigger to feel happy; whereas for a person who is really happy, the circumstances and situations outside just magnify the happiness within him, or more precisely, it gives him more clarity of the thing that is within him – This is one of the most basic differences between a superficially happy person and a person who is happy from within.
Happiness is not part of your emotions:
For a person who is superficially happy, happiness is like an emotion. Emotions are like seasons that come and go. At one moment you are happy, at another moment you feel depressed and so on. So if you are not really happy, you will find that your happiness is just momentary.
This does not mean that you will never be miserable. A happy person is capable of being miserable too, but unlike a superficially happy person, his happiness gives his life a certain depth.
A person who is superficially happy is miserable too, but his misery is like a sickness. He feels absolutely hopeless in his misery. His misery is suicidal. His misery may lead him to do the wrong things. On the other hand, a happy man’s misery will always take him one more step closer to even more happiness than before.
So when I say that happiness is not part of your emotions, what I’m saying is that your happiness is permanent irrespective of your circumstances. A miserable person cannot enjoy his misery, but a happy person can.
In fact, no other person enjoy’s misery as much as a happy person does, because he is fully aware that once the misery is gone, he will be happy again.
You don’t laugh as often as you did before:
Now, this may sound really ridiculous but I want you to understand the psychology behind laughter. Why does a person laugh? A person generally laughs when he has some sadness inside of him.
Have you ever seen the statues of saints, mystics and enlightened people from the past? Look at Jesus’ statue. He seems as though he’s had enough of life, or take a look at a picture of Bodhidharma.
Bodhidharma looks almost like a monster ready to destroy the whole planet. You will find almost every enlightened person with a serious face. I’ve always wondered what was wrong with these people. If they found God, then why do they look sad?
The reason why all of these saints and mystics look serious is because there is no need to laugh or smile. They are already joyous, so what’s the point? Please understand this because it may sound like a contradiction, but it isn’t.
When a man is really happy, he finds no reason to laugh, because a person almost always laughs only to hide his suffering.
For a person who is happy from within, laughter loses all meaning simply because sorrow has no meaning either. It is not something to be surprised about. When there is nothing that can make a person unhappy, is it not logical to conclude that there is nothing that can trigger laughter either?
Yes, a person who is happy from within does laugh, but his laughter has a totally different reason. His laughter or smile is not to hide his tears. In fact, he laughs to give the world a glimpse of his inner world which is full of joy.
You become Creative:
The moment a person finds himself filled with joy, he wants to put all of his energy into a certain task. Hence creativity comes naturally to a happy person. If you are really happy, you will automatically become creative.
The same thing applies when you are sad, or full of misery. A miserable person as well creates. The only difference being that he cannot be creative.
In the world there are two types of people, those who create, and those who are creative. A person who is miserable can write songs, can dance, and sing, just as a person who is really happy – the only difference being that the former cannot be creative.
It is one thing to create, and a totally different thing to be creative. Everybody creates something or the other in this world, but not everybody can be creative. A person can be called creative only when his act of creation is driven by an undercurrent of happiness.
So what you create does not matter as much as the consciousness with which you create. Just as a liquid takes the shape of the container in which it goes, in a similar way, your creation will take the shape of the consciousness with which you create it.
This is the basic difference between being creative and being a creator. To be a creator, you simply have to create, but what you create doesn’t matter. You can create sadness, misery, and hate and still call yourself a creator.
Therefore, creation is not the criteria. Your inner state is the criteria.
Everything that I have discussed above are ways in which you can find out whether you’re happiness is superficial or whether your happiness truly comes from within.
Remember that whatever I have written is not so that you can go out and judge whether others. Everything that I have written in this article is meant for the purpose of analysis of onself.
Do share your views on happiness in the comments down below. I would like to hear from you.